My in laws recently took a trip to Africa with Outreach International to learn about the culture and process Outreach has with people. Check out my earlier post “The Eyes of Love” talking about my experience with OI. At one village they got off of the bus to visit with their community leaders and see the progress they have made in community change. My mother in law vividly remembers stepping off of the bus and the real young kids immediately running in fear and crying.
Now of course this is where I insert any mother in law joke that comes to mind.
Joke - I am amazed that her reputation is not only known nationally but internationally.
Joke - I am assuming they were taking my strategy of not speaking to my mother in law. It's been two years, we haven’t quarreled, I just don’t want to interrupt her.
Joke - The kids had heard there were more vicious things than Lions they just hadn’t seen them until now.
Ok that’s enough! In all reality I have a great mother in law that is very respectful of boundaries and I received her approval before posting any of these jokes.
She said the kids ran because they had never seen this big a group of white people before. They were stricken with fear for something they had not experienced. As she thought about it, it became real to her that we fear what we do not know. Fear is a natural emotion we feel. It was in this moment she realized the importance of educating and teaching acceptance to overcome fear.
Acceptance allows us to see and understand others instead of letting fear drive our actions and behaviors. Too much of what we see and get from media or others today is fear. Fear others are taking our jobs, creating unsafe situations, or not practicing the right beliefs. But we have to find ways to not follow the fear but go to the source to truly understand what is going on.
So lets explore how acceptance impacts our spiritual journey's. Specifically lets look at what teaching acceptance is, a more in-depth look at why its important, and where God is in the midst of this.
How to Teach Acceptance?
Teaching acceptance is a process of eliminating fear from our lives slowly while embracing who others are. Culturally respecting others beliefs and perspectives is imperative for peace. Acceptance is not about coexisting but embracing others differences. Others' choices may not be our own but respecting who they are and the choices they make are vitally important for building community.
So what are some ways to help us teach acceptance?
Story Telling - Stories are essential ways for people to hear others perspectives. They bring emotional attachment to situations and problems creating more pull with people. Stories have a way of working into our heart strings and pulling them ever so gently.
Dialogue - Talking with others allows multiple perspectives to be shared so there is common understanding of all potential concerns and problems present. There is almost always two sides of every problem.
Let Go of Personal Stereotypes/ Judgments - We are not void of judgments as much as we try. But acknowledging our judgments and letting go of them creates an openness for others and ourselves to learn. Internal awareness of our own processes is some of the major work we can do.
Exposure - When we find ourselves with negative thoughts or ideas in our head about a certain group of people its important that we go to the source. Direct exposure tends to be the best and most accurate knowledge. Spend time learning for yourself what the group is about and who they are.
Culturally Diverse Books - Reading books about other cultures and by authors from different backgrounds can help us become more accepting. They are great way to educate us when we are too shy or timid about interacting with others. Check out our guest blog post "Diversity and Your Bookshelf" by William Ottens to read further about this.
Golden Rule - This applies as we imagine ourselves when we use the words we use. This is all the time not just when someone is around us. Positive thoughts bring more positive thoughts.
At the heart of personality is the need to feel a sense of being lovable
without having to qualify for that acceptance.
Tolerance Is A Dirty Word?
Some people believe tolerance is what needs to happen while others believe that is not enough. Where do you stand? Should we as society just be tolerant of others? Is tolerance a step toward acceptance? Or does acceptance need to happen for someone to be truly valued?
I tend to think its not about just being tolerant of others but accepting others as able and capable of making their own decisions. This means seeing the positive qualities and characteristics we can out of individuals. Below is a TEDx video by Andrew Sayer which talks about Tolerance being a dirty word. I thought it was an interesting perspective and wanted to share it with you.
Unity in Diversity
Community of Christ has an enduring principle of Unity in Diversity. It’s a core belief that our differences make us better and that those differences are needed for us to be whole as a community. I find when I really try to live by this principle, I become less frustrated with others, more open for help, and more willing to learn.
I think this enduring principle is also a goal. If we truly are to be one with each other we have to acknowledge and value the differences we find. This can be difficult but when we become more diverse we actually become more efficient and effective. As I have stated before more diverse work forces actually create better financial gains. Check out this article “Why Diversity Matters” for details.
Another example is just looking at nature! The diversity in the habitats of the world create balance and support systems. Look up the root systems of aspens, the pollination of bees, or the running of salmon to see how we are all integral parts of one another. Others depend on us and our unique roles in this world.
It’s about seeing the Christ in me and the Christ in you as parts of the whole. Without all of us in this together what’s the point? Without you alongside with me what really matters? Unity in diversity breathes the need for us to truly sit and be with one another. Bask in each other’s presence and love the person for who they are. So how do we live this as a community? Well how about we figure that out together.
Thank you for all those who are enjoying our posts! We welcome any feedback you have.
This week ask another person what is something that has been hard for them to accept. Truly listen to their perspective no matter how different it is from yours.
The views expressed here are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of Community of Christ. We believe individuals should be allowed to have their own opinions and be at different places in their faith journey.